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Tech Rep: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?" Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty period. How do I go about getting that fixed?" Tech Rep: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?" Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer." Tech Rep: "Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped, it's because I am. Did you receive this as part of a promotion, at a trade show? How did you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?" Caller: "It came with my computer, I don't know anything about a promotion. It just has '4X' on it." At this point the Tech Rep had to mute the caller, because he couldn't stand it. The caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder, and snapped it off the drive. One of the guys grabs the shotgun and shoots the dog. The shotgun is loaded with #8 birdshot, hardly big enough to stop a Lab. The dog stops for a moment, slightly confused, but continues on. Another shot and this time the dog, still standing, becomes really confused and of course terrified, thinking these two geniuses have gone insane. The dog takes off to find cover, under the brand new Navigator truck.. The men continue to yell as they run away. The exhaust pipe on the truck is still hot, so the dog yelps and drops the dynamite under the truck, and takes off after his master.A new York Divorce Lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. Saint Peter asks him "What have you done to merit entrance into Heaven?" The Lawyer thought a moment, then said, "A week ago, I gave a quarter to a homeless person on the street." Saint Peter asked Gabriel to check this out in the record, and after a moment Gabriel affirmed that this was true. Saint Peter said, "Well , that's fine, but it's not really quite enough to get you into Heaven." The Lawyer said, "Wait Wait! There's more! Three years ago I also gave a homeless person a quarter." Saint Peter nodded to Gabriel, who after a moment nodded back, affirming this, too, had been verified. Saint Peter then whispered to Gabriel, "Well, what do you suggest we do with this fellow?" Gabriel gave the Lawyer a sidelong glance, then said to Saint Peter, "Let's give him back his 50 cents and tell him to go to Hell."
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Tu ti tu tu tu tu

Trong một khách sạn ở London. Có tiếng chuông reo ở quầy tiếp tân. Nhân viên phục vụ nhấc máy và nghe có tiếng người nói:

- Tu ti tu tu tu tu!

Anh này chẳng hiều đầu dây kia nói gì, bèn dập máy. Lại có tiếng chuông reo, và vẫn câu nói ấy:

- Tu ti tu tu tu tu!

Nhân viên phục vụ lại dập máy. Lại có tiếng chuông reo, và lần này vẫn lại đúng câu ấy:

- Tu ti tu tu tu tu!

Nhân viên phục vụ tức điên người, dập máy rõ mạnh. Vài phút sau, một anh chàng xuất hiện ngay trước mặt nhân viên phục vụ, quát lớn:

- Này ông kia, ông có hiểu tiếng Anh không hả? Tôi đã nói 3 lần rồi: “Mang ngay 2 ly trà vào phòng 222 !”

(Two tea to Two Two Two)

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